Saturday, May 9, 2009



By Jerry Okungu
Nairobi, Kenya
May 5, 2009

The rumor in the streets of Nairobi is that men are planning their own sex strike against their women folk. Mind you; this is still just a rumor since the organizers have yet to agree on a common umbrella body before they finalize the programme and other activities that will go with this rare event.

The other day, I bumped into Philo Ikonya, one of the better known women activists that were at the forefront of the current sex boycott. In my brief discussion with her, she gave me the impression that their effort had been largely successful even if skeptics had tended to ridicule the statement they intended to make through this sex thing.

Having said that; let’s see how the women could actually have achieved what they intended to achieve in the first place. In other words, how effective is sex as a weapon to discipline errant men generally and specifically non performing male political leaders?

To begin with, the crave for sex thrives when it is scarce, in short supply or generally forbidden. This applies for both the male and female species among all animals. Sex is basically the animal instinct. It has no respect for office or authority. That is why kings, emperors and princes are only respected outside their bedrooms. In the bedroom, spouses rule the order of things.
The reason why the Kenyan boycott had its busters wagging their tongues was not because it would be ineffective. The tongue wagers had problems with its messengers.

Yes, some of them looked like they were way beyond any sex appeal and had probably stopped engaging in such childish activities a long time ago. That was the reason some of the women who were violently opposed to the boycott were the younger lot in their late 20s and 30s; the ones that swore publicly that they would continue to provide their partners with the necessary services as usual.

The African society is a special one when it comes to sexual orientation or conditioning.

Boys grow up in the knowledge that they are the hunters. They will chase girls to the end of the earth with all manner of persuasive tactics to have sex with them. The girl is brought up to play that hard to get type for as long as it can take if not for anything but to prove to the boy that she is not cheap.

In most cases the girl wants tons of assurances that the man chasing her is not just interested in “using and dumping her” after the act. Girls look for meaning and long lasting post sex relationships. Boys on the other hand may want to experiment and sample this experience with as many partners as possible before they settle on one.

To be denied sex by a girl a boy craves for can be frustrating if not indicting for the boy among his peers. This is why many boys will go to any length and even lie to their peers that they indeed have had “it” when in fact nothing had happened.

In marriages where sex is abundantly available, men take it for granted until that day the spouse decides that she is not in the mood. Suddenly the man who has gone for days without bothering her feels the urge.

Talking to some Kenyan men over the recent boycott, I found some of them to have been relieved by the week long boycott even if their spouses were not on strike. This is because in today’s world, there are so many men that are incapable of meeting their spouses’ sexual needs; hence they latched on the opportunity to be in solidarity with the G10 Women group.

Did the boycott succeed? I would say the women made the most important state of their lives. The fact that the boycott remained the topic of the week for seven days; even eclipsing the Coalition wrangles, Migingo dispute and Somali pirates means that women succeeded in making their statement beyond their wildest imagination.

On the flipside of things; the G10 inadvertently boosted the business of their sisters in all corner s of the city including K Street. A casual survey by various media groups in Nairobi proved that the Red Light District had a boom in these hard times of economic melt down.

Now we must wait with baited breath how my brothers will fare with their own counterattack. The problem is; they have yet to define why they are planning their strike since the coalition partners are fellow men!